Destination Review: The Doctor

Not the actual very sharp something.

 

Apparently "Going to the Doctor" is something us babies are pretty much obligated to do.  It seems to happen with more frequency than I'd like (I'd prefer never) and with little to no warning.  I still haven't figured out why we have to "Go to the Doctor". 

Sometimes we go so that the Really Really Really Nice Lady can tell me how cute I am and then jab me with a very sharp something.  What the what?!  If you are a really really really nice lady, why are you forced to work as a Baby Jabber?  Can't you find employment as a Swimming Teacher (my Swimming Teacher is a really really really nice lady and the most unpleasant thing she has to do is put my face in the water) or a Person Who Carries a Briefcase (Mamamamama carries a briefcase and is frankly the nicest lady I know)?! 

Other times we go so that the Relatively Friendly Lady can put me on a "scale" and tell Dadada for the bazillionth time that I am in the "50th percentile".  Apparently this is very important information and Dadada makes sure to call Mamamamama to share the news as soon as we leave the Doctor.  Dadada repeats the things he said to the Relatively Friendly Lady, like "great", "sounds like everything's on track", and "that's encouraging", so I'm guessing the Relatively Friendly Lady is doing some good work as a Scale Operator.  The only feedback the Really Really Really Nice Lady gets is when I purposefully give her my best "I thought you liked me!!?  WHHHYYYYY WOULD YOU DO THAT TO ME?!!!!!" eyes.

If the Doctor was to ask me how they could improve on the experience of "Going to the Doctor", I would tell the Doctor that they could use more toys, less jabbing, and more job opportunities for the Really Really Really Nice Lady.

Bottom Line: WAAAH!!!!  The only benefit of "Going to the Doctor" from what I can tell, is that I can safely remove Baby Jabber from my list of potential careers (Cat, Swimming Teacher, Scale Operator and Person Who Carries a Briefcase are still on the list).